Despondence

You aren’t exactly the strongest person in this world
You fall apart by Tuesday afternoon,
Plunging yourself into a gray mass of melted newspapers
From which maroon butterflies flutter –
Sometimes it drips down and coats me in muck
I’m marching into the world wearing your problems
As it has been for years – I’m accustomed to the style
But the fashion’s moving on
And it’s about time for a makeover

Though I love you, and it pains me to say this,
You’ve never seen light in the times I’ve tried to save you

Welcome – I’ll show you the world
This is the ditch your in, which you dig deeper
With everyday that passes
This is rope I’ve thrown you a million times
(See how the threads are running short)
This is the amount of times I’ve jumped down with you
The gallons of detergent I go through to clear the stains
(Which never seem to fade at all)
And every passion played and soul splattered tear I shed
Always seems to rain on you

You’re a marble chess piece broken in half
You’re delicate, you’re crucified by your own misery
And I’m lying two ticks behind hopelessness
I’m shelving my sickness with you and
Collecting miserable memorabilia
All the laughter is fleeting
All the happiness is evanescent
You are vague –
You are cloudy –
Relentless and tiresome fog blinding life and stealing purpose

This is me giving up
On the only “give up” person in my life

You have no idea how it hurts to break free from your grave
Grow wings and try to fly, just when you find
That a concrete block
(Painted gray, as it is ever)
Is holding you down
It’s pouring water into every ballooned memory in my life
Melted newspaper
Just because there’s nothing to tell

You’re old news.